Hi there, and a very warm welcome to my blog.
 
My name is Milla. I am a young female, professional (CA) SA in corporate South Africa (JHB). 
 
I capture my experiences in the world of work, my everyday style, weekend steeze, some travel, food, fun and fitness. Hope you enjoy viewing life through my eyes!
Harassment Part II

Harassment Part II

Welcome back readers! I know I have been really quiet, and I do apologise. Life sure is one tough balancing act. The last time I shared with you was in September, about harassment. Isn't it crazy how this #MeToo movement blew up not too long after?! Well here is the continuation from me, I promised you part 2 - and this, is more about how I deal with it now. Encouraging you all to change, whatever it is - if you feel it is toxic, if it no longer makes you happy - do the necessary and change it.

Through my 30 years of life - I learnt the hard way that if something no longer serves you, grows you or even no longer makes you happy in a way that is affecting you negatively - leave it all behind, let it go. In a world where, when the hobo at the traffic light who forcefully washes your windscreen after you begged him not to, swears you for not giving him your hard-earned money, you let it go. When the police at the petrol station ogled over you while you were minding your own business - you let it go, when the men who work in your building look at you like a piece of meat every time you walk by - you let it go. When some random guy grabs your ass at a club - you let it go, cos you don't want to make a scene. When your boss came on to you - you let that go, even though you started fearing for your life, your career and work just became an unbearable environment because no one else knew this burden you were carrying, you eventually just leave, afraid of fighting a battle you might lose, afraid of getting your reputation tainted for "taking things too personally"... Given the person I was just a few years ago in high school and varsity - and given the person I am now - there is one vast difference - I let A LOT of shit go!! "Pick your battles carefully" I tell myself. It's almost as if this is a normal part of womanhood - being harassed. Being targeted as a "sex symbol" and because it happens so damn often - I got tired, I let it go. I mean, I would be one very bitter bitch if I reacted to every single incident I went through I decided...As women, we are constantly badgered with unwanted attention - seldom has this been innocent and or cute in any way, it has been perversion, an exercise of power by some men (and women in some cases). I would be lying if I categorised all men as trash, because my partner right now - let's just say, he has taught me what men really should be. But here's the thing - I'm losing my desire to fight over everything as I grow older - honestly, there are bigger fish to fry right now. It does leave its damage though, emotionally...So I wonder then, what is the point of this #MeToo movement? We let it go. It's a by-gone now. The perpetrators probably do it so often that they even forgot their inappropriate behaviour towards you and continue it with other victims, so, what is the point - bringing it up so so many years later...Surely we should speak up as and when it happens so the person can be dealt with then and there. Shaming many years after the fact has surely left that perpetrator committing more of these crimes...

So my message to you woman, in whatever crappy situation you may find yourself in (not to equate women abuse to everything else in life or to even draw comparisons to such!) but my message, especially as the year closes is stop letting some shit go - be absolutely fearless. If ever you are abused, harassed, intimidated, belittled, extorted, taken advantage of in any way - speak up! Be bold, get the perpetrator convicted if necessary, hold people accountable to their actions! So that in future, less women are hashtagging MeToo to anything. We need to nip what some may consider appropriate behaviour in the bud as much as possible. 

And with that, I leave you to enjoy your festive. I hope you clear your head, reflect on all that you have achieved in this time, set new achievable goals, spend time with your favorites and eat to your heart's content! Merry Christmas, you will hear from me in the new year again.

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